Hannah is sitting a studio recording her song One in a Million. Lola and Robby are watching from outside the booth.
HANNAH (singing)
# How did I get here?
I turned around and there you were
I didn't think twice or rationalize
'Cause somehow I knew
That there was more than just...
As Hannah continues to sing, Lola starts talking to Robby.
LOLA
Man, Miley is so lucky. Her voice is so pure and natural and...
Lola leans down on the table, accidently knocking the mixer panels. Hannah's singing starts to sound robotic.
HANNAH
# But I figured it's too good to be...
Hannah stops singing and they all look around.
HANNAH
Okay, I know I had a chilli dog for lunch, but there is no way that's me.
Robby notices that Lola is leaning on the mixer panel.
ROBBY
Uh, Lola...
LOLA
Oh, sorry! My bad.
She moves off the panel and starts bringing the buttons back down. A ringing starts and Hannah falls to the ground in the booth, dropping her headphones.
***
Later on, Hannah is back in the chair finishing the song. Lola is standing beside Robby watching through the glass.
HANNAH
# You're one in a million
Whoa, oh-oh. Yeah.
(spoken) How'd that sound, dad?
ROBBY
Perfect.
Hannah takes off the headphones. Lola walks into the booth.
LOLA
That is such a great song! Have I told you it's my mom's favourite? Hey, here's a wacky idea. Her birthday's coming up. Maybe you could make a special kind of personal recording and I could give it to her as a present?
HANNAH (looks at Lola's shoes)
You spent all her gift money on those shoes, didn't you?
LOLA (defensive)
They didn't have them in her size.
HANNAH
I hear you. Last Christmas, (shows her dangly earrings) I bought daddy this earrings.
LOLA
See? This is why we're friends.
HANNAH
Exactly.
LOLA
So you'll do it? You'll record the song?
HANNAH
Nope, you will.
Lola breaks into a laugh, and then notices Hannah is serious.
LOLA
You're not kidding.
HANNAH (shaking her head)
No. Kidding is when I tell dad he looks good in that dorky moustache.
ROBBY (speaking through the microphone)
Your mike's still on, darling.
Hannah innocently turns around to Robby.
HANNAH
Love you!
Robby gives her a thumbs up. Hannah turns back to Lola.
HANNAH
Lilly, to really make this special, you're gonna have to record the song.
LOLA
But I don't have a voice like yours.
HANNAH
You'll be surprised what you can sound like in a professional studio. (hands Lola some headphones) Trust me. You're gonna sound great.
LOLA (unconvinced)
Okay.
Hannah heads out of the booth.
***
Later on, Lola is sitting in the booth and has just finished singing One in a Million. Well, singing is an overstatement. It was so bad that Hannah and Robby struggle to give it praise.
LOLA (singing badly)
# You're one in a million, whoa-oh-oh...
(spoken) So, do you think my mom will like it?
HANNAH (lying)
Like it? She's gonna be speechless. Right, dad?
Hannah looks over at Robby, who is speechless himself.
ROBBY
Um, uh...
HANNAH (to Lola)
You see?
Lola gives Hannah a wink and a thumbs up. She returns it.
***
OPENING CREDITS
***
Oliver and Miley are at the table in the Stewart's kitchen, listening to the CD of Lilly singing really badly.
LILLY (VO) (badly singing from the CD)
# They say that good things take time
But really great things happen in the blink of an eye
Thought the chances to meet somebody like you were a million...
Oliver slowly turns the CD off.
OLIVER
I haven't felt this queasy since my grandpa dragged me into that shirts and skills b-ball game at the senior's centre. (uneasy) The skin was bouncing more than the ball.
MILEY
I could've lived my whole life without that picture in my head.
Oliver takes the CD out of the player.
OLIVER
You're not actually going to give this to her, are you?
MILEY
Of course not. I'm going to give her this one.
Miley puts a different CD in the player. It's a nice-sounding version of One in a Million. After listening to it a bit, Oliver turns it down.
OLIVER
Wow, a little reverb, some overlay. Nice.
Oliver and Miley pound fists together.
MILEY
Daddy called it, "extreme mix-over: Lilly edition".
Unbeknown to Miley at the start, Lilly arrives and walks in through the doors near the piano.
MILEY
Now she'll never know how unbelievably...
Lilly walks down, catching Miley off guard.
LILLY
Hi, hi!
MILEY (finishing her sentence)
-- Completely wonderful she is! Listen to you, you singer...you.
Miley starts to the play the CD of the good singing.
LILLY (after hearing the CD)
Oh, my gosh! I'm fantastic!
OLIVER
Almost too good to believe.
Miley stomps on Oliver's foot, making him sink down a little with a snicker.
OLIVER
...But not.
LILLY
My mom is gonna be so blown away. I got to tell you, I was a little nervous. (ashamed) Nobody in my family can really sing.
OLIVER
Yeah? Heredity's a powerful thing.
Miley stomps on Oliver's foot again. He sinks down a little, snickering again.
OLIVER
For instance, my mom's feet always hurt (looking at Miley), and now so do mine!
MILEY (to Lilly)
Hey, why don't you just, uh, listen to the headphones? You know, get the full effect.
Miley places the headphones on Lilly's ears, holding them in place as she turns to Oliver.
MILEY(to Oliver)
I'm trying to do a nice thing here. Lilly's happy, her mom's gonna be happy, who's it gonna hurt?
LILLY (singing along badly to the CD)
You're one in a million... (!)
Oliver and Miley pitch their ears.
OLIVER (answering Miley's rhetorical question)
Any creature with ears.
LILLY (singing along badly to the CD)
Whoa, whoa, whoa... (!)
Lilly turns around to face Miley and Oliver. They each give her a smile and a thumbs up.
***
Down on the beach at Rico's Shack, Rico comes walking over to Jackson behind the counter. He is wearing a moustache, and a red shirt which is tucked into his black braced pants. His hair is all puffy. He stops and talks to a couple sitting at a table.
RICO
Yeah. Go ahead and look, but you can't touch.
He winks at them and continues over to Jackson.
JACKSON
Dude, what happened to you? Did you get lost on the way to the bullfight?
RICO
Go ahead and joke, but my father won my mother's heart dressed like this.
JACKSON
Your father's a billionaire. He could've dressed like a duck and won her heart. (reaching for Rico's lip) And what died on your lip?
RICO
Stop it! (gesturing at Sarah) She'll see.
Sarah is over on the beach sitting on a purple mat with her eyes closed, meditating.
JACKSON
This is all for Sarah? Oh come on, Rico, what'd that poor girl ever do to you?
RICO (dreamily)
She stole my heart. (starts pacing) I just wish I had someone who could find out if she likes me, too. A friend, a pal...(abruptly turning to Jackson)...and easily replaceable employee!
JACKSON
All right, fine. But lose the 'stach, or the next thing you know, she inhales it during a kiss, you become the laughingstock of the school, and you're forced to move from Tennessee to California. (on Rico's look) Believe me, it can happen.
Jackson approaches Sarah and goes and squats next to her.
JACKSON
Hey, Sarah. Nice pose.
SARAH (coming out of meditation)
Thanks. It aligns my chakras.
JACKSON
Well, you're gonna be in for a chakra when you hear what I have to say.
SARAH (hopefully standing)
The President got my letter and agreed to give Arizona back to the Apaches?
JACKSON
This'll go a lot faster if you just stop talking.
SARAH
Okay.
JACKSON (taking Sarah into view of Rico)
Look, there's this guy who really likes you, but he's kind of shy. And, he doesn't want to say anything until he knows whether you like him too.
SARAH
Oh, my gosh. Does this guy go to my school?
Rico nods to himself.
JACKSON
Yeah.
SARAH
And is he maybe not the tallest guy around?
Jackson shoots a quick look over at Rico, who looks himself up and down.
JACKSON
Yeah.
SARAH
Oh, Jackson! I like you too!
JACKSON
Huh?
Before he can stop her, Sarah latches herself onto Jackson with a big hug.
JACKSON
No, I...
Jackson looks apologetically over at Rico, who tears of his moustache and walks away looking upset.
***
At school, Miley and Lilly are downstairs in the cafeteria when Mr Corelli comes calling from the stairs.
MR CORELLI
Okay, okay, all ninth graders, listen up! The circus I hired for the freshman fundraiser (suddenly sad) is no longer available.
There's a sigh of disappointment from the student body.
MR CORELLI
Last night, the fire-eater had a bad taco and burped the place to the ground. But, no worries. One of our very own has come up with a brilliant, last minute substitution.
Amber comes down into sight and stands next to Mr Corelli on the staircase.
AMBER (exaggerated sing)
# Karaoke niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii...
MR CORELLI (interrupting)
Night! Karaoke night! They get it.
The students all applaud as Mr Corelli and Amber make their way down from the stairs.
AMBER (as she comes downstairs)
For admission, you get food, drink, and the chance to get up there and be compared to...
By now Amber is standing beside Ashley.
AMBER (continued – exaggerated sing)
# Meeeeeeeeeeeeee...
MR CORELLI (interrupting)
You! You. They get it. Well, now I know not all of us can sing as well as some people. (Ashley has been pointing at him) Stop pointing. But I still expect to see everyone here and singing on Saturday night!
The students don't seem as enthused as Mr Corelli, as another sigh sounds.
MR CORELLI
Hey, it's either this or a car wash. (gesturing at himself) And trust me, you don't want to see this business in a wet T-shirt.
He makes some funny noises and walks off.
AMBER
Hey, Miley, if you're too gutless to sing, you can always go up there and do one of your pig calls.
MILEY
Oh, you mean like this? "Amber, Ashley, get in here!"
Miley snorts like a pig. She, Lilly, and all the students around start laughing.
LILLY
Boo-yah!
ASHLEY
That's weird. Her pigs have our names. (on Amber's look, realizing) Ohhh...
AMBER
Real mature. Exactly what we'd expect from the tone-deaf twins.
AMBER/ASHLEY (together)
In your face! (signature sizzle) Oooo, tsss.
Amber and Ashley go to walk off, but Lilly follows after them.
LILLY
Well, what you don't know is that I happen to have a really great voice.
MILEY
What?! No! Lilly, you can't sing...(on Lilly's look, realizes she is caught)...up there, with Amber.
LILLY
Why not?
MILEY (thinking on the spot)
Because I'm coming down with something, and (coughs on Lilly), and I just gave it to you, sorry.
AMBER
You two are coming down with something, all right. (flaps her arm like a chicken) Chicken pox.
ASHLEY
Emphasis on the (flaps her arms like a chicken) "chicken".
AMBER (annoyed)
I put the emphasis on the chicken.
LILLY (to Miley)
What are you so worried about? You heard that CD, I can take her. Hey, check this, Twitney Houston, I'm gonna sing you off that stage.
AMBER
Oh, it is so on. I'll see you Saturday night, Smelly Clarkson.
ASHLEY
You heard her, Celine Peon.
Amber and Ashley start walking away together.
AMBER
You can't "Celine Peon" after I "Smelly Clarkson".
LILLY (to Miley, as Amber and Ashley have gone)
This is gonna be so great! When she hears my voice, she's gonna freak!
Lilly walks off.
MILEY (to herself)
She ain't the only one, honey.
Miley follows after Lilly.
***
Down at the beach, Rico is sitting at the counter and has just finished a glass of strawberry milk. Marty, the guy on shift, is holding the carton.
RICO
Hit me again, Marty. (Marty fills the glass with milk) And this time, leave the carton.
Rico drinks his milk up and slams the glass back on the bench. Jackson walks over.
RICO
Well, well, well, if it isn't the Sarah-stealer, the babe bandit!
JACKSON
Look, Rico, she came on to me. Do you really think I want a fourteen-year old girlfriend whose idea of a hot date is snuggling around a campfire roasting gluten-free marshmallows?
RICO
I don't care what you want. (gazing away) All I care about is Sarah and her happiness. (suddenly abrupt) That's why I need you to crush her and send her crawling back to me!
Rico takes another sip of his milk.
JACKSON
Look, I am not gonna break her heart. I'll find another way. And aren't you lactose intolerant?
Rico burps.
RICO
What's it to you?
Jackson waves away the smell. Sarah runs over.
SARAH
Hey, Jackson! This weekend, want to go get typhoid shots together?
JACKSON
Why would I want to do that?
SARAH
So we don't get typhoid when we go to build alternative housing in Tanzania, you silly goose. (playfully hits Jackson on the shoulder) Bye!
She waves at him and runs off again. Jackson turns to Rico.
RICO (a hand to his heart)
I should be the one risking infectious disease in Tanzania!
JACKSON
No arguments here.
Rico takes a shortcut from pouring the milk into his glass and drinks straight from the carton. It's a mistake, though, because Jackson takes advantage of the opportunity and hits the end of the carton. The milk goes pouring down all over Rico's clothing and face. Jackson laughs, as he puts the carton down and spits the excess milk out.
***
At the Stewart house, Miley is playing the piano and Lilly is lying on the top.
LILLY (trying to sing a musical scale)
La-la-la-la-la-la-la.
MILEY (in a musical scale)
# Try to hit all of the notes.
LILLY (badly singing)
# I'm hitting all of the notes.
Lilly jumps off the piano.
LILLY
Miley, we've been at this for an hour. I don't want to damage voice.
She heads down to the couch in the lounge room.
MILEY
Trust me, that ain't gonna happen.
LILLY
I don't even know why I need to do these stupid exercises.
Lilly crosses her leg. Miley comes and sits beside her.
LILLY
We both know I'm gonna blow Amber off the stage.
MILEY
This isn't about Amber. This is about you being the best you can be.
LILLY
But I'm already the best I can be.
MILEY (looking to the side)
Oh, I hope not. (turning back to Lilly) I mean, there's always room for improvement, right?
Robby arrives and walks in through the front door. He's holding the mail and heads for the kitchen, talking to the girls in passing.
ROBBY
Hey, Lilly. How'd your mom like her birthday present?
LILLY (badly singing)
# She loved it
ROBBY
Did you play it for her or sing it?
Miley and Lilly follow Robby through to the kitchen.
MILEY
She played it, her mom loved it, and now Lilly has challenged Amber to a sing-off in front of the whole ninth grade.
LILLY
Yep. I'm gonna sing I Got Nerve.
ROBBY
You sure do.
MILEY (whispering to Robby)
Help me!
Robby walks over to Lilly.
ROBBY
You know, Lilly, your voice reminds me of another great singer.
LILLY(excited)
Really? Who? Beyonce? Shakira?
ROBBY
Johnny Cash.
LILLY (excited at first)
Really? (down) Huh?
ROBBY
Yeah, you just got something really special about your voice, something honest.
Lilly doesn't seem impressed.
MILEY (aside to Robby)
Where are you going with this, cowboy?
Robby ignores Miley and turns straight back to Lilly.
ROBBY
Now, you see what Johnny does, is he talks his songs.
MILEY
Brilliant...(on Lilly's look)...ly. He uh, he talks his songs brilliantly.
Lilly looks confused.
ROBBY (speaking the lyrics of the song)
We haven't met, but that's okay
'Cause I know you will be asking for me someday
MILEY
Ohhhhh. Chills.
LILLY (suspicious)
Okay, what's going on?
MILEY (lying)
Nothing! (aside to Robby) Got anything else?
ROBBY
Can she rap?
LILLY
Hello?!!! Still in the room!
MILEY
Daddy, maybe it's time that...
ROBBY (interrupting)
Leave? If you insist.
Robby briskly turns away and runs upstairs.
MILEY (calling after)
I was gonna say "tell her the truth"! Coward! (chuckles, then turns to Lilly, trying to avoid the topic at hand) Hello!
LILLY
What truth?
MILEY
This...
Miley's smile fades as she leads Lilly over to the CD player on the table. She hits the play button and the original recording of Lilly's bad singing starts to play.
CD LILLY (badly singing)
# Help me before I get used to this guy...
Miley stops the sound. Lilly looks horrified.
LILLY
What did you do to my voice?
MILEY (with great struggle to get the truth out of her mouth)
On this CD, nothing. On the one you gave your mom...a lot.
LILLY (horrified)
You re-mixed me?!
MILEY
Technology. Gotta love it, huh? (hits Lilly playfully)
LILLY
Oh, man. So this is how I'm gonna sound in front of the whole ninth grade? Thanks a lot.
Lilly sighs and walks away, heading for the front door. Miley follows.
MILEY
Lilly! I'm sorry. I was just trying to do something nice.
LILLY
Oh, like what? Ruin my life? If I don't sing, Amber makes a fool out of me, and if I do sing, I make a fool out of me .
MILEY
What do you want from me? If I could loan you my voice I would.
Lilly and Miley look away from each other, but then turn back into each other's eyes with grins on their faces.
LILLY
Hit it!
Lilly's going to lip sync. She moves her mouth and spreads her arms out as Miley sings the musical scale.
MILEY
La-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Lilly shakes her arms about.
LILLY
Sorry. I like to go for a big finish.
MILEY (slightly demanding)
You'll take what I give you.
LILLY
Yes, ma'am.
***
Down at the beach, Sarah is walking around with a metal detector. She walks over to the counter when she spots Jackson spraying hair spray in his hair.
SARAH
Jackson, what are you doing?
JACKSON
Just locking in perfection, baby. I call it "shellacasing the Jackson". Gorgeous and water-resistant to 200 metres.
He sprays some more on.
SARAH
But aerosol sprays are ruining our ozone. Aren't you worried about global warming?
JACKSON
So my grandkids will never see a polar bear, big whoop. I never got to see a dinosaur, you don't see me crying about it.
Jackson goes to spray some more of the hairspray in his hair but nothing comes out of the nozzle.
JACKSON
Oh man, I'm all out.
The camera pans out as Jackson throws his can into a pile of discarded cans on the sand opposite the counter. Sarah watches in disgust as he reaches for a new can underneath the counter.
SARAH
You can't just leave those there. They have to be properly disposed of in a hazardous waste facility.
JACKSON
Oh, I've got a hazardous waste facility. I call it the Pacific Ocean.
Jackson jumps the counter and throws his newest can down onto the pile.
SARAH
But that'll pollute our beaches!
JACKSON
I don't care. Aren't I horrible? You should break up with me.
SARAH
Break up with you? You need me now more than ever.
JACKSON (horrified)
What?
SARAH
This is perfect! I was feeling guilty about spending time with you when I could be saving the world, but now by spending time with you, I will be saving the world!
Sarah leans over and gives Jackson a quick hug and releases herself.
SARAH
Ow! Your hair hurts.
JACKSON
All right, look, look, I don't have a crush on you. I never had a crush on you. When I came to talk to you, I was talking about Rico. He's the one who likes you.
SARAH
He doesn't look like he likes me.
No sooner does Rico come walking past, arm in arm with a cute girl who is his size and most probably his age.
JACKSON
Sweet niblets!
Jackson walks over and pulls Rico aside.
JACKSON
Excuse me. What are you doing?!
RICO
Chilling with my new girl, (rolls his 'R') Rosalita.
JACKSON
But what about (rolls his 'R') Sarrrah? You were nuts about her!
RICO
I was. Until I met (rolls his 'R') Rrrrosalita.
JACKSON (rolls his 'R')
Sarrrrah!
RICO (rolls his 'R')
Rrrrrrrrrrosalita!
JACKSON (rolls his 'R')
Sarrrrrrah!
RICO (rolls his 'R')
Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrosalita! (normal) Ain't love grand?
Rico turns away back to Rosalita. Jackson turns to Sarah.
JACKSON
Look, Sarah, I'm really...
SARAH (interrupting)
It's okay. It's obvious you weren't emotionally ready for me.
JACKSON
Yes! Yes. Thank you for understanding.
SARAH
That's why I'll wait.
JACKSON
Huh?
SARAH
I waited six years for the California low-flow toilet initiative (places an arm on Jackson's shouler), and I can wait for you. (pause) Bye!
Sarah walks off.
JACKSON (calling after)
But I'm not worth waiting for! Ask anybody!
The people on the beach all salute their drinks up to that one.
VARIOUS CROWD MEMBERS
Yeah! Yup!
JACKSON (insulted)
Okay, she gets it. Thanks.
***
Saturday evening, the Karaoke night at school. The ninth grade students are sitting in front of the stage listening to Amber finish singing Hannah Montana's song Bigger Than Us. Miley and Lilly are watching from a back room.
AMBER (singing)
# We all want to believe in love
We all want to believe in something
Amber continues the song as it cuts to Miley and Lilly in the back room, which looks like a kind of science lab.
LILLY
Oh, man, she sounds good.
MILEY
Yeah, but you’re gonna sound better. (holding up a microphone) Oliver's got this microphone patched into the same frequency as the stage mike. So I'll be singing in here, your mouth moves out there, and Amber's mouth just does this...(stares into thin air with a dropped jaw)
LILLY
Got it. (heads for the door and turns back) Oh, remember, I like a big finish.
MILEY (pushing Lilly out)
I remember. Just go, and have fun.
Lilly walks out. Miley turns back into the room.
MILEY (to herself)
Singers. They're all divas.
Miley shrieks and steps back when she looks into a plastic container and finds a spider on display.
MILEY (looking at the spider)
There ain't nothing itsy-bitsy about you, big boy.
Back in the karaoke area, Amber is finishing up her song as Lilly walks back down. The students are jigging to the tune.
AMBER (singing)
# We all want to believe in love
We all want to believe in something
Bigger than us
The students crazily applaud Amber. Mr Corelli comes onto the stage.
AMBER
Thank you, thank you. I was good, wasn't I?
Mr Corelli makes a fake laugh and takes the microphone from Amber.
MR CORELLI
That's the always humble Amber Addison with Bigger Than Us.
They all applaud again, with the exception of Lilly and Miley, who just roll their eyes.
MR CORELLI
All right, who's next?
STUDENT #1
No way.
STUDENT #2
Not me.
ASHLEY (about Amber)
Boy, I sure wouldn't want to go up there and sing after someone that wonderful! (spitefully to Lilly) Who could possibly follow Amber?
MR CORELLI
Oh, I believe the gauntlet has been thrown down! Will Lilly Truscott pick it up?
Lilly looks over to Miley in the window for assurance. Miley gives her a smile and a gesture to say "get on that stage!". Lilly turns to Mr Corelli.
LILLY
Give me that mike.
Miley, who is watching through the window, doesn't realize when she is leaning back that she accidently slides the lid off the cage containing the spider. Lilly goes up onto the stage and takes the microphone from Mr Corelli.
MR CORELLI
You've got guts, kid. (walks off the stage)
LILLY
That's not all I've got. I got never. Hit it, Oliver!
Oliver hits the switch and Miley starts singing, as Lilly moves her lips and moves around, making use of the space on the stage.
MILEY (singing on Lilly's behalf)
# We haven't met, but that's okay
'Cause you will be asking for Lilly one day
Don't want to wait, in line...
As Miley continues to sing and Lilly continues to move around, Amber and Ashley have a secret conference with one another.
AMBER
I didn't know she had a voice like that.
ASHLEY
She sounds exactly like...
AMBER (interrupting)
Shut up!
ASHLEY
But she's amazing! (on Amber's look) Amazingly bad. Oooh, Tsss...
She puts her finger out but Amber doesn't respond.
MILEY (singing on behalf of Lilly)
# And I think that I can shake you
I know where I stand
I know who I am
I would never run away when life gets bad, it's
Everything I see
Every part of me
Gonna get what I deserve
I got...
As Miley has been singing, the spider that she unknowingly set free, has sneaked up onto her knee.
MILEY (screaming as she sets eyes on the spider)
SPIDER!
On stage, Lilly doesn't know what to do. As the spider crawls onto Miley's arm, she continues to sheepishly sing.
MILEY (somewhat singing)
# Electrified, I'm on a wire
Getting together, we're on fire
What I said, you heard
Now I got you spinning
Lilly tries to make it sound like part of the act. Amber and Ashley look way to proud of themselves as they see Lilly make a fool of herself. Miley is jumping around trying to get the spider off her.
MILEY
Don't close your mind
The words I use are open
Miley gets herself tangled up in the fake spider web made up on the wall in the lab she's in. The microphone starts to pitch and Lilly looks really embarrassed. Oliver looks around for an explanation.
AMBER
Yeah, you got nerve all right.
ASHLEY
Just no talent!
The students begin to laugh at her. Embarrassed, she hands the microphone to Mr Corelli and races out, running into Miley halfway who's still trying to untangle herself from the fake cobweb.
MILEY
Lilly! (throws the cobweb away) I am so sorry.
LILLY
Come on. Let's just get out of here.
Lilly and Miley go to run out, but are stopped by the voice of Oliver. They turn back and the students are all gathered around.
OLIVER
Lilly, hold up. What're you guys laughing at? At least she had the guts to get up there. Even though she did completely humiliate herself.
LILLY (sarcastic)
Thank you! Come on.
Lilly goes to walk off. Miley holds her back.
MILEY
No, Oliver's right. (pause) She did humiliate herself.
LILLY
I think they heard it the first time. What kind of friend are you?
Lilly walks out into the corridor. Miley calls after her.
MILEY
The kind I should've been all along.
Lilly turns back and listens as Miley speaks to the students.
MILEY
Sure, Lilly doesn't have a great voice. Most of us don't, but does that mean that we shouldn't sing?
AMBER
Yeah. Now who wants to hear me?
Being her shallow self, she turns back to get the microphone from Mr Corelli.
MR CORELLI
Amber, let's not (singing) interrruuuupppt! (to Miley) Carry on, I beg you.
MILEY
Singing shouldn't be about showing people up. It should be about having a great time no matter what you sound like.
Miley turns away and walks back over to Lilly, who is standing in the corridor by herself.
MILEY
And I should've known that. Lilly, I'm sorry. I should've never messed with that CD. You mom would've loved it, just 'cause it came from you.
LILLY
Yeah, she is a big mush ball.
MR CORELLI (from the stage)
So who wants to come up here and have a good time?
Miley brings Lilly back into the room.
MILEY
Go up there. Show them the real Lilly Truscott. I think she's pretty great.
LILLY
Thanks. (turning to Mr Corelli) Mr Corelli, I want a do over.
MR CORELLI
You got it.
Lilly heads for the front. Miley calls after her.
MILEY (calling after)
Hey, Lilly! Don't forget your big finish.
Lilly nods as the beat for Life's What You Make It starts to sound. She's nervous at first, and despite her terrible voice, starts singing.
LILLY (singing)
# With a new attitude everything can change
Make it how you want it to be
Miley starts clapping along to the beat. The rest of the students join in.
LILLY (singing)
# Staying mad, why do that?
Give yourself a break.
Laugh about it and you'll see.
Miley proudly watches Lilly rock the stage.
***
Later on, Oliver is up on the stage (badly) singing Life's What You Make It.
OLIVER (singing, shy)
# Life's what you make it
So let's...so let's make it rock!
Make it rock...
A change sees Mr Corelli now singing to the best of his ability.
MR CORELLI (singing, proudly but badly)
# Life's what you make it
So come on, come on, come on
Everybody now
Another change sees Rico up on stage, singing some Latin music sounds, finishing off with a Hannah Montana verse.
RICO (after singing the Latin verses)
-- So let's make it rock!
Lilly and Miley are standing beside Amber and Ashley down in the audience.
LILLY (to Amber)
Congratulations, you're the best singer in school!
MILEY
Too bad nobody cares!
AMBER
Uhhhhhh!
Amber storms off, leaving Ashley.
ASHLEY
Yeah! Uhhhhh!
Ashley storms off after Amber. Lilly and Miley step closer together and Miley holds out her finger to mock the signature sizzle of Amber and Ashley.
MILEY
Oohhhh...
LILLY
No.
MILEY
Oh, yeah. We do this.
Miley and Lilly do their own handshake, which is much more stylised than Amber and Ashley's.
LILLY/MILEY (together, after doing the handshake)
Bam!
They smile and laugh together.
***
Hannah Montana © Walt Disney. No infringement is intended through the transcription of this episode originally written by Ingrid Escajeda
