2x17 - Don't Stop Til You Get The Phone

Robby is at the mirror by the staircase, looking at himself as he puts on a fake-moustache. Jackson is sitting on the couch.

ROBBY
Uncle Earl? Hmmm...(puts on a different moustache)...Or, Aunt Pearl? What do you think, son?

JACKSON
Wow. Put on an apron and a pair of combat boots and you could be her twin.

ROBBY
You're right. (changes the moustache back) I think I'll go with Earl.

Robby walks down into the living room. Hannah and Lola come in from upstairs, ready for a concert. Hannah is holding her "O-Phone".

HANNAH
Daddy, I urgh...I think you need to take the canyon. The highway is jammed. And, argh...how do I know that? (gloating to Lola) Because I have streaming live traffic on my new O-Phone! "Tomorrow's technology – today, today, today..."

LOLA
I know, I know. (takes out her phone) Man, I wish I had the O-Phone instead of this stupid Slim Flip. Oh, look at me, I'm slim and I flip, I'm slim and I flip, I'm slim and I flip...

Lola has been flipping the lid of her phone up and down, and it eventually goes flying over towards the television.

LOLA
Oh, man!

Suddenly, a voice from the TV is heard.

ANNOUNCER (V/O)
Do you want the O-Phone?

LOLA
Oh yes I do! (she and Hannah cross to behind the couch)

ANNOUNCER (V/O)
Oh, no you don't. Not when you can have the new Z-Phone! With high def display, and digi dynamic sound, it makes the O-Phone old news.

Hannah and Lola are staring at the TV screen, Hannah's eyes wide open and alert...

HANNAH
Oh...

***

Hannah and Lola are following behind Robby as they walk into the backstage area. Hannah is about to perform a concert.

HANNAH
Oh, daddy! You saw that commercial.

ROBBY
Yes, I did. Very nice graphics.

HANNAH
Dad, the Z-Phone's not just a phone. It's full of dynamic digi...(pause)...stuff...I have to have it!

ROBBY
Now that's what you said when you begged me for the O-Phone.

HANNAH
I was a child then.

ROBBY
It was last month!

As Robby walks off, Hannah calls after him.

HANNAH
But I've grown! I have new phone needs! (turning to Lola) Tell him, Lola.

LOLA
Why? So I can hear you brag about your new-new phone?

STAGE VOICE (V/O)
Give it up for Hannah Montana!

HANNAH
Help me out and you get this one. (waves her O-Phone in Lola's face)

Lola takes the phone, as Hannah runs on stage.

LOLA
Oh, boy! (walks to Robby, at the curtain) Shame on you for buying her this dinosaur. I am disappointed in you, mister!

ROBBY
Somehow I'll go on.

HANNAH
(on stage through microphone) I would like to dedicate this concert to my daddy. A dad as cool as the new Z-Phone! How awesome are they? (cheering from the audience) Hold that thought. (turns to Robby) Did I mention it comes with GPS? Ooohhh!

ROBBY
Did I mention I ain't getting' it? Ooohhh...

Hannah gives an annoyed grunt as she turns back onstage.
***

OPENING CREDITS

***

Hannah has just finished performing the concert.

HANNAH
Thank you, Long Beach!

Hannah walks off stage, and puts on a cute puppy-dog face as she passes Robby.

ROBBY
Darling, it's a phone, not a kidney. You can live without it.

HANNAH
(following Robby) But...but daddy!

Hannah's friend Traci Van Horn runs over, pushing Lola out of the way and stepping in between them.

TRACI
Hannah! Loved your shout-out to the Z-Phone. I just can't live without it.

HANNAH
(looking at Robby) You don't say.

ROBBY
Honey, did I ever tell you that when I was a kid, I had a one-eyed carrier pigeon who just flew around in circles? Kept bring me my own note back. (pause) I survived.

TRACI
(laughs) Oh, Hannah, your daddy's so phone when he goes all "Pony Express".

ROBBY
Well, I'm glad I can amuse you. Now I just got to get out back there and saddle up the old limo.

TRACI
(laughs) Stop it!

As Robby walks away, Hannah and Lola follow Traci to the food table.

TRACI
(to Hannah) So, what's your Z-code so we can Z-chat and Z-text?

HANNAH
M...mine's still in zee box.

LOLA
(under her breath) Yeah, in zee store.
HANNAH
I'm having it Hannah-fied. (takes Traci's Z-Phone) Like yours...but more. If that's possible.

TRACI
I can't wait to see it.

HANNAH
(dreamily) That makes two of us.

Traci's phone beeps.

TRACI
Oh, I'm getting a Z-minder!

After having a struggle to pull it out of Hannah's grip, Traci finally retrieves it and a hologram of her pops out of the phone screen. Hannah stares at it dreamily.

HOLOGRAM TRACI
Traci, time to leave for Amanda Bynes's beach barbecue to benefit baby belugas.

Hannah stares at the phone with her jaw dropped. Traci flips it off.

TRACI
I'm just so grateful, to live in a world where people like us, can have phones like this.

HANNAH
I know.

TRACI
Chow.

HANNAH
Chow.

Traci walks off, Hannah following before turning back to Lola.

LOLA
Why did you say you have that phone?

HANNAH
Simple. I have the IQ of a peanut! (looks back to make sure Traci is gone) As soon as she finds out that I don't have that phone, she's gonna' tell everybody. (impersonating Traci's voice) Beyonce, did you hear? Hannah doesn't have the Z-Phone. (normal voice) I'll be a joke! (gradually gets louder) I want that phone, I want that phone...

Hannah latches herself onto Lola's neck.

HANNAH
I WANT THAT PHONE!!

A photographer leans down on a harness and snaps a photo of Hannah's little hissy at Lola.

PHOTOGRAPHER
Oh, Hannah has a Hissy! Thanks, kid.

HANNAH
Can't you people ever give me a break?

PHOTOGRAPHER
Sorry, kid. This picture's gonna' pay for my new Z-Phone...

Hannah and Lola look up as they watch the photographer being pulled up on his harness. His voice gradually becomes an echo in the sealing.

***

Miley and Lilly are sitting at a table on the beach, outside Rico's. They both have copies of the newspaper, HANNAH HAS A HISSY, the front page.

MILEY
I cannot believe this. I made myself look like a total idiot, all because of that phone.

LILLY
(excited) I'm on the front page!! Don't I look so cute when I'm scared?

MILEY
If you don't get over yourself in about three seconds (threatening), you're gonna' look absolutely adorable.

LILLY
Three seconds, that's it?

MILEY
Take it or leave it.

LILLY
Fine.

MILEY
(looks at her watch) Go.

LILLY (standing; speaks in a rush) Look at my hair! Look at my eyes! Look at my outfit! (dancing around) I'm a star, I'm a star, I'm a star!

MILEY
Time!

LILLY
OK, I'm good. (sits back down)

Miley's phone rings. She picks it up and checks out caller ID.

MILEY
It's Traci calling on her new Z-Phone. You know what? I'm just gonna' tell her the truth. It can't be any more humiliating than this picture. (answers the phone; starts pacing; Lilly follows) Listen, Traci, about the Z-Phone...

Cuts to Traci on the other end – she is lied down, on her stomach, getting a massage as she speaks on the phone.

TRACI
Aargh-argh! I call firsties. Did you hear the dish on Dakota? She doesn't have the Z-Phone because her daddy won't let her. Isn't that positively medieval?

Cuts back and fourth to the beach and the massage room, in turn.

MILEY
Yeah, imagine having a father like that.

TRACI
I know. (to the massager) Ow! Svetlana, you're massaging my neck, not wringing out a mop! (talks into phone again) Anyway, promise you won't tell anyone.

MILEY
(with hope) Because you don't want me to embarrass her?

TRACI
Of course not. That's my job. (the massager starts hitting Traci's back hardly) Chow...ow!

Now fully cuts back to the beach, as the phone conversation between Miley and Traci has ceased. Lilly and Miley are standing out by the counter at Rico's.

LILLY
Well, it must feel good to get that off your chest. (on Miley's dark looks) You know, life is a lot easier with a sense of humour.

MILEY
Life is also a whole lot easier with that phone! (crosses and leans on a seat)

LILLY
You know, it's funny. Just last week you actually did have the money, but you spent it all on those shoes and that purse, and that, argh...Miley necklace. (gestures for the necklace around Miley's neck; Miley gives a nasty look) Remember what I said about a sense of humour.




MILEY
This is so unfair. (grabs the newspaper) Some sleazy, disgusting paparazzi gets a humiliating picture of Hannah, and suddenly he has the phone I want.

LILLY
Yeah, I know. If only we were sleazy and disgusting, we could take a picture of you and sell it.

Miley's facial expression shows that she has a plan formulated in her devious mind...

LILLY
What?

MILEY
(holding out her hand) How you doing, Sleazy? I'm Disgusting.

Lilly hesitantly shakes Miley's hand.

***

Jackson comes downstairs dressed ready for his volleyball game. Robby is lying on the couch reading the newspaper.

JACKSON
Hey, dad. Wish me luck. I'm off to a shirts and skins volleyball game, and argh...lucky for the ladies, I'm skins. Kapow! (flexes his arms)

ROBBY
You got your wallet?

JACKSON
Yeah...

But Robby chucks it at him...

JACKSON [CONT'D]
...Now. (turns off)

ROBBY
How about your sunglasses?

JACKSON
(turns back) Yes...Robby chucks them at him)...now.

ROBBY
(as Jackson heads for the door) And did you remember to put on...

JACKSON
(cutting Robby off) Underwear? Of course, I'm not an idiot!

But just to be sure, Jackson turns around and checks.

ROBBY
(lowering the newspaper) I was gonna' say sunscreen, but I'm glad to hear about the underwear.

JACKSON
Come on dad, do you really think you need to remind me about sunscreen? I live in LA, I go to the beach everyday...

ROBBY
So you forgot.

JACKSON
I'll put it on when I get there! Stop treating me like a child! Gosh! (walks out)

***

Jackson comes walking up from the beach, sunburnt and struggling to move...

JACKSON
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...

Robby is in the kitchen making a sandwich.

ROBBY
Jackson! Is that you?

JACKSON
(taking off his sunglasses) Aargh-huh.

ROBBY
How'd the volleyball go?

JACKSON
What can I say, dad? I was on fire out there.

ROBBY
That's my boy. Now go shower up, we got us some Tennessee football to watch!

JACKSON
I think I'm just gonna' go take a nap.

ROBBY
Nap? Stewart men don't nap when there's football on. That's what golf is for!

JACKSON
OK, I'll be right down.

Jackson grunts again, as he turns away and bumps into the wall.

***

Hannah and Lola peek their heads into the backstage area where her concert was last night.
HANNAH
Hello?

LOLA
Hello?

HANNAH
Perfect, no one's in here. (closes the door and they walk in) OK, we can do this. I'll call it: Hannah...(takes off her hood to reveal hair curlers throughout)...before the glamour.

Hannah leans up against a wall, and strikes a dramatic pose. Lola looks at her with the camera. Lola gives an unsatisfied twitch of her nose and Hannah takes another gasp, striking another pose...but Lola still doesn't take the snap.

HANNAH
(seemingly annoyed) Take the picture already!

LOLA
I don't know. It looks too posed.

HANNAH
That's 'cause it is posed!

LOLA
See, that's the problem. (they start crossing each other) We need to make it look more spontaneous, like you were taken by surprise. We need to argh...make it...

Lola leans up against the wall and hits a switch. The rope near Hannah's foot captures her up and hangs her upside down. Lola doesn't see Hannah hanging.

LOLA
Hey, Miley, do you know what this thing does?

HANNAH
Aargh, I think I got a pretty good idea.

Lola looks up at the upside-down Hannah.

LOLA
Hey, that could work.

HANNAH
You think?

Lola snaps a picture of Hannah, and looks at the result...perfect!

***

Robby is on the lounge, watching the TV, with his number-27 jersey on.


ANNOUNCER (V/O)
And Tennessee football is on the air!

ROBBY
(calling) Son, get your butt down here, it's kickoff time! Hoo-ya! Hoo-ya!

Jackson approaches from upstairs, wearing his number-10 jersey. He has covered himself with blue-zinc to hide the sunburn.

JACKSON
Boo-ya! (walks down with a slant on his back...but as Robby looks up he walks straight)

ROBBY
I personally love the look, but I think you need to put a little more boo-yah in your hoo-yah!

JACKSON
(frayed effort) Boo-ya!

***

The office of Auggie, the editor of the National Inquiry. Auggie is sitting at his desk looking at the photo of Hannah – Lilly and Miley are standing in front of him.

AUGGIE
Ha, I love it! It's embarrassing, humiliating, demeaning!

LILLY
I know, she looks like a complete idiot.

MILEY
(anxious) He gets it.

AUGGIE
(standing) Congratulations, you just knocked "Double-Jointed Vampire Bites His Own Butt" right off the front page. (places his hands around Lilly and Miley) Look at you. The future of sleaze journalism. I'll be right back with your blood money. (walks out)

LILLY
Man, I hope this Z-Phone is worth it.

MILEY
It is. And trust me, there's been a lot worse pictures of Hannah.

LILLY
(looking at camera) I don't know, this one's pretty goofy. I mean, your hair in curlers, and your eyes bugging out, and your Miley necklace flopping al over the place...

As Lilly zooms in on the necklace, Miley turns and gives Lilly a shocked look.


MILEY
Future of sleaze-journalism say what?

Miley quickly runs to Lilly's side and checks out the camera.

***

MILEY
Oh, my gosh. As soon as they blow up this picture, they blow up my secret! How could you have missed this?

LILLY
Me? You're the one who bought that stupid necklace. If you had gotten your name on a refrigerator magnet like I did, we wouldn't have this problem.

AUGGIE
(walking back in) Here's your money, kids. Thanks to you, in two days, that picture's gonna' be on every newsstand in the country.

MILEY
Yeah, a...a...about that, see, um...we're starting to feel, argh...(stammers)...a little uncomfortable with this situation...

AUGGIE
Ah, first-timer's guilt. You'll get over that once you start spending that money. Hey, have you seen those new Z-Phones? Incredible.

MILEY
Yeah...I'm more of a letter writer. (laughs) Anyway, I really need that picture back.

AUGGIE
You know what I need back? The hair I had in 1980! (pulls up his wig) It's on my back now.

Both Lilly and Miley exclaim in disgust.

AUGGIE
Life is cruel, get over it. Now get out! (answers his ringing phone) Talk!

LILLY
What are we gonna' do?

MILEY
I don't know!

AUGGIE
(on phone) I don't want excuses. The Rock's in town for his new movie, he's staying at The Plaza, and I need a picture that makes him want to crawl under a rock. And then a regular photo, my son's a fan. (hangs up)

MILEY
We can get you a picture of The Rock.

AUGGIE
I'm listening.

LILLY
So am I...

MILEY
I will trade you one humiliating picture of Hannah for an even more humiliating picture of The Rock.

AUGGIE
(standing) Kid, if you can get me a picture of one of the world's most popular movie stars, looking more ridiculous than your picture of Hannah Montana, you got a deal. (holds out his hand for Miley to shake)

MILEY
(shaking Auggie's hand) Easy peasy, lemon-sleazy!

LILLY
Oh, boy.

MILEY
(taking Lilly out) Come on.

***

Jackson and Robby are still watching the footy.

ANNOUNCER (V/O)
He breaks a tackle! He could go all the way!

ROBBY
(jumps up) Touchdown! Time for another Tennessee Touchdown Stomp!

JACKSON
Again?

Jackson stands up beside Robby and they both start chanting, doing a little dance. This hurts Jackson's sunburn.

JACKSON / ROBBY
Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo-ya! Hoo-ya! Hoo-ya! Hoo, Hoo, Hoo-ya! (Jackson and Robby hit on each other's stomachs, Jackson goes flying to the couch with a whimper)

JACKSON
Yeah!

ROBBY
Son, what is the matter with you?

JACKSON
I'm just a little stiff from the volleyball game.
ROBBY
(walks to behind the couch) Well, sit up here and let me give you a good, hard Robby Ray rubdown!

JACKSON
(sitting up; as Robby rubs his hands together) No! No, no, no, really dad, I'm all right.

ROBBY
Don't be silly. What you need is a good, old fashioned, deep-tissue massage, (rubs his hands together), from hands strengthened by years of steel guitar playing. (claps his hands) All right! Here I come.

JACKSON
(whispering) Here he comes.

ROBBY
Get ready.

JACKSON
OK.

ROBBY
(reaching down) Almost there.

JACKSON
Almost there...

As Robby is about to touch Jackson's shoulder, Jackson jumps up from the couch.

JACKSON
OK! OK! All right! I admit it! I'm burned! I forgot the sunscreen.

ROBBY
(sarcastic) No.

JACKSON
Wait a minute, when did you figure it out?

ROBBY
(mocking Jackson) Ow! Ow! Ow! I heard you halfway up the beach, son. Luckily, I know just how to fix it. (winks)

***

Outside on the deck, Jackson is lying in a bath tub of milk that Robby has just finished pouring full.

ROBBY
So how are you feeling? The milk starting to take the sting out?

JACKSON
Yeah, actually it is. How much longer do I have to stay in here?



ROBBY
Mamaw said a couple of hours, but don't worry. I bought you a little snack.

Robby pours some breakfast cereal into the tub.

***

The Plaza Hotel corridor, outside The Rock's suite. A photographer is holding a dessert pie and a camera.

PHOTOGRAPHER #2
Come on, Rock. It's time for your just desserts.

Miley and Lilly have approached from behind, dressed in white clothes carting a trolley. They watch as the photographer kicks on the door and snickers. The Rock steps out, but the photographer looses courage...

THE ROCK
Are you sure?

The photographer smacks the pie on his own face.

THE ROCK
Good choice. (closes the door and walks back in)

PHOTOGRAPHER #2
(to Miley and Lilly) I could've stuck with weddings and bar mitzvah's, but no, I had to go for glamour.

The photographer spits some pie from his face as he walks off.

LILLY
That's it, I'm out of here.

MILEY
Lilly, no! (pulls Lilly back by the arm)

LILLY
What? I don't look good in strawberry-cream pie!

MILEY
And I am not gonna' look good with that big old honking Miley necklace on the cover of that rag. Now suck it up, we're going in.

Miley and Lilly, with their cart, approach The Rock's suite door and knock shyly. As he answers, they stare up at his height.

THE ROCK
Can I help you?

MILEY
Actually, argh...we are help to help you. We are your complimentary mani-pedi, hair and facial specialists, Mr...Um, uh...The Rock.
LILLY
(shy giggle) The Rock.

MILEY
(about Lilly) Little bit of an air-head, but she's the Picasso of pimple-popping. Isn't that right, Lillian?

LILLY
That's right. No muss, no fuss, no pus, that's me. (pause) And I don't like pie. (another giggle)

THE ROCK
Listen ladies, I really appreciate it, but I don't have time for this, so, sorry...(turns away)

MILEY
(exclaims as she takes The Rock's hand) Oh, good gracious! Look at those cuticles! Oh! (Lilly and Miley welcome themselves into his suite) Oh, you do not know how close you came to a hangnail, my little box-office sensation.

THE ROCK
Well, I am gonna' see my mom a little later, so I guess a quick buff wouldn't hurt. (looking at his palm) Oh, and maybe a little clear coat.

MILEY
Now we're talking!

***

Miley and Lilly have the Rock sat comfortably on a black wheel-chair near the lounge suite, an apron on and his eyes closed. Miley and Lilly stand either side of him.

MILEY
Now, we will take care of everything. So just relax, close your little eyes, and make sure you keep them closed until the treatment's done. Early opening could be hazardous to your health.

LILLY
And ours. (covers her lips)

MILEY
Promise?

THE ROCK
I promise.

LILLY
Pinky swear? (The Rock holds up his "large" pinky compared to Lilly's) That's a pinky? (they shake on it)

***

Just a little while later, Miley is painting his fingernails bright red.

THE ROCK
This feels like more than a clear coat. Remember, it's got to look natural.

MILEY
Trust me, they look perfect.

We now see that not only have they painted his nails, but they have also put red lipstick on him, mascara, foundation, and all other things to make him look girly. He sits there oblivious, with his eyes shut. Lilly reaches over and puts some product on his lip.

THE ROCK
Why are you still putting stuff on my lips?

LILLY
(improvising) I'm trying to save them. They're drier than the Sahara...Desert, in the summer.

MILEY
Lillian!

LILLY
Yeah, and blot.

THE ROCK
(licking his lip) Hmmmm...well, that tastes good. What is that? Is that strawberry?

LILLY
(anxious; yet nervous) Uh-huh!

Miley comes over again, with some pearly earrings.

MILEY
(rubbing his earlobes) And now, for a relaxing earlobe massage.

THE ROCK
Oh...

MILEY
(putting on the earrings) You may feel a slight pressure. (pause) That's normal. (jumps the couch to the other side and repeats) You do not know how much tension builds up in those lobes, honey.

THE ROCK
Oh, oh, that's working. That's it.

MILEY
Yeah.

THE ROCK
That's the one.


MILEY
And now for the best part.

THE ROCK
Great...

MILEY
(looking at Lilly for assistance) A Himalayan...temple massage.

THE ROCK
(as Miley rubs his temples) Oh, oh! Rocky-likey!

He continues to exclaim, in relaxation, as Lilly takes over. Miley goes to the cart and gets Hannah's curlers. Gently, Lilly puts it on...but The Rock feels it.

THE ROCK
What are you...what are you putting on my head?

LILLY
(stepping down, looking to Miley for assistance) Nothing...it's just a...urgh, hair follicle...extenuator thing.

THE ROCK
Well, what does it do?

LILLY
Oh, you'll see.

Lilly pushes the chair a little to the left. Miley is standing in front of him ready with the camera.

MILEY
OK, and open your eyes in three, two, one...

The Rock opens his eyes and Miley takes the snap.

MILEY
Run!

Miley and Lilly run for the corridor.

THE ROCK
Hey, wait! Oh, my...(calling after them) Hey, can't you people just ever give me a break?

Miley stops in her tracks after hearing this. Lilly runs past.

LILLY
Run, run!

Back in the suite, The Rock looks at himself in the mirror.

THE ROCK
I can't go out there. Look at me. I look like Grandma Rock.
Out in the corridor, Lilly comes back.

LILLY
Come on Miley, run!

MILEY
I can't do it.

LILLY
Left, right, left, right. It's just like walking, but faster.

Lilly tries to drag Miley on, but she won't budge.

MILEY
No. I can't sell this picture. I've been on the other side of the camera. I know what it feels like. If I don't give him a break, how can I expect anyone to give me one?

LILLY
But what about your secret?

MILEY
I'd rather have everyone know I was Hannah Montana than know I was just as slimy as those paparazzi.

Miley trudges back to the door, followed by Lilly, and knocks.

THE ROCK (V/O)
Aargh, I'm not decent.

MILEY
It's us.

THE ROCK
(opens the door and looks around) You're not getting the earrings back.

MILEY
Actually, I just wanted to say this was wrong, and...sorry. (holds out the camera for him)

LILLY
And for the record, I knew it was wrong the whole time! (Miley mimes for her to shut her mouth) OK...

THE ROCK
Why'd you do it?

MILEY
Long story.

THE ROCK
You can explain it while you're de-clawing me. (holds out his nails)

Miley and Lilly step in after him.

***

Lilly and Miley are sat either side of The Rock on the lounge chair in the suite.

THE ROCK
So all this started just because you wanted a Z-Phone?

MILEY
Yeah. I guess I just got so caught up in having the next thing.

THE ROCK
You know Miley, there's always going to be something new coming around the corner.

LILLY
Hey, that's what my mom says. (On The Rock's look) Aargh, not that you remind me of my mom. You know, except for the nails, 'cause these are her nails.

Lilly laughs, but The Rock just shakes his head shamefully.

MILEY
(handing him the memory card from the camera) Here's your picture back. I really am sorry.

Miley stands up and heads for the door.

MILEY
Come on Lilly, let's go.

LILLY
(standing) But, Miley, without The Rock picture how are we gonna' get the Hannah picture back?

MILEY
Guess we're not.

THE ROCK
(standing up) Is there some kind of problem?

MILEY
Yeah, but it's my problem. I've bothered you enough.

THE ROCK
Well, hold on, maybe I can help.

MILEY
Really?

THE ROCK
Sure, you did the right thing by me. And, that was the best facial I've ever had. I mean, look at me. Am I not glowing?

MILEY
Well, in that case...maybe there is something you can do.

***

Cuts to the office of Auggie – Miley and Lilly are standing side by side, Miley holding the embarrassing picture of Hannah Montana.

MILEY
Thanks for finally giving me my picture back.

But we can now see that Auggie is being held upside down by The Rock...

AUGGIE
Well, after I thought about it, I figured it was the right thing to do.

THE ROCK
Good choice.

Lilly and Miley return a smile at The Rock.

***

Robby is sitting on the couch in the living room, reading the newspaper.

ROBBY
(calling) Hey, Jackson. You can probably get out now.

JACKSON (V/O)
That's OK. I'm kind of enjoying it.

ROBBY
Aren't you getting lonesome out there?

JACKSON (V/O)
Actually, I made some new friends.

Out on the deck, where Jackson is still lying in his tub of milk, some cats are licking at the milk with their tongues.

JACKSON
(to the cats; pauses where natural) Oh, slow down, Tiger, you're gonna' get a tummy ache. Sure hope nobody's lactose intolerant. And Boots, you're making a mess. What are you, a dog?

The cat meows at Jackson.

JACKSON
Sorry...

***

Hannah Montana © Walt Disney. No infringement intended.